In recent experience, I have interacted with a wide range of individuals, all exhibiting the same type of emotional quicksand, fear. Fear is elusive because we have become so accustomed to the state of fear that we don’t recognize it for what it is, and that it is driving our decision-making process despite our best intentions.
We recognize the emotion of fear as what happens at a haunted house or when we watch a scary movie. It’s the flutter in our chest or belly, the prickling on our skin, the increased heartbeat. Yes, these and many more symptoms are connected with fear, but fear is bigger than we give it credit for.
Sometimes we see fear as protecting ourselves. We are putting in place these regulations, rules or policies because someone has hurt us and we don’t want it to happen again. Please don’t misunderstand. I’m not saying we should not protect ourselves and establish healthy boundaries. However, when we take actions purely because of past hurts without regard for a balanced approach that achieves our true purpose, we are acting out of fear, not self-awareness. When we take or don’t take actions based on not wanting to deal with something, that is a key indicator of fear. We are afraid we will fail. We are afraid we will get hurt. We are afraid we won’t be rewarded. The fear can be based on multiple predicted outcomes, and that’s what makes it so difficult to recognize.
To add to the confusion, fear is sneaky. It goes by many names. Ambition is the fear of failure. Control is the fear of chaos. The litmos test for fear is to determine whether your actions are based on your divine purpose. If your actions are aligned with your purpose, then you are probably setting healthy boundaries and ensuring self-care. If the answer is no, then you have fallen into the emotional quicksand we know as fear. Recognizing fear is the first step to ascending it. Once you identify that you are experiencing fear, it loses some of its power.
Many would say that the key to overcoming fear is courage, and it is in part. However, the opposite force that neutralizes fear is gratitude. If you are grateful for your accomplishments, you cannot be worried about failing. If you are grateful for the people you work with, you cannot be afraid to accept others. If you are grateful for your experiences, you will not fear getting hurt. Gratitude is incompatible with fear and the stronger of the two forces if you have the courage to choose it.